heyy

heyy

the music in my head is so calm
the feeling of your soft warm skin
the smell of cigarette smoke and cologne fills the air
as you kiss my lips my world slows down
I feel the leak in my heart being repaired
and my heart filling with love

LOVE

I feel my brain telling me no
that soon enough the repair will break
and once again my heart will will ache
be drained and empty

the confusion of confession.
telling the truth always gets me in trouble
I'm happy when you happy
I'm what makes you happy
no need to try
no need to work harder on making us better
your happy
I'm not
I need more
I need us to be more i need more from some one
I'm sorry i never meant to hurt you
I only wanted to find love
and now in the end all i have is a large empty heart
all you have is confusion
but don't worry its not broken
its just swollen

everyone wants the same thing. no one is born wanting to die to be unhappy to feel sad unwanted used or threatened. these feelings are all learned. but at the same time so are the feelings of being happy warm wanted and beautiful. we learn to love we learn what is beautiful what is normal what is liked disliked weird and strange. i want love. i want to feel wanted to feel beautiful to be warm touched hugged kissed and complimented. to feel like im apart of something maybe to just have friends. but in the end where do we go? we make choices which influence the rest of our lives. how much they influence our lives we can never know. something as small as choosing to wear a pink shirt over blue may be the difference of finding a love or losing a love of catching a bus of missing a bus. we can't worry about small things. in the end what do you have. i know that in the end all i want is to be happy and feel loved by someone who to me is perfect someone who should change nothing. some one who loves me for me and respects the way i live the choices i make the things i stress over and some one who doesn't care what color shirt i wear or if i missed the bus someone who loves the me for me<3

your everything i want.
you say everything i want.
now can you please do everything you say?